Wednesday, June 24, 2009
You know what's even funnier-is that women even tend to control the opportunity to cook or bake even if a guy can do it! It's like we enjoy these little stereotypes we are stuck in and we just can't find a way out. I think its great you offered to do the non-conventional thing and I think especially if you work with older women who may be more old school-your act was probably pretty shocking. You seem to have gained alot from this class so keep on pushing people to see beyond the box. After all what's the point of learning if you can't share your knowledge!
Good luck to you!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
It's funny because when your dealing with little girls, things that make them more like women are deemed acceptable. Like using words like sexy or babe. Or skinny jeans for 7 year olds. Halter tops for toddlers. Its shameful how we encourage little girls-or even babies in this case-to be viewed and treated as women already. That explains why girls have such a hard time in adolescents! As far as the twins getting dressed alike-well its both lazy and superficial. What a way to limit your children right! If mommy's lucky they'll even think alike and she can limit her arguments. I recently substituted in a class where the twin boys were dressed alike and I felt so bad for them- they were both unique and special in their own way and they deserved to be able to show that. Instead they were grouped together on numerous occasions because teachers can't help it-when they already look alike and dress alike its hard to differentiate. It makes me sad!
Response to Mario's comment:
In response to your question- it is a fair one. But I have to wonder, if men AND women are drafted for the war who will be home taking care of the economy, jobs, and our children? I also think physically you'd have a lot more women that don't qualify for the war, so now you have a bunch of people being drafted that basically have to be weeded through even harder than the other group. Am I suggesting women are less capable- overall I'd say yes. Just like our book says-women are nurturers and communicators. Where is there room for that in war? It takes a special kind of women to serve in war and I think drafting would just make it harder to find them.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
John and Kate Plus 8 is NOTORIOUS for making men look like helpless bums. From Kate's side remarks during interviews to the skewed images you see of John doing nothing. It really is very backwards in that sense. You would think that a wholesome family show like that would make a better effort to show things for how they really are-crazy and hectic for everyone. If you ever catch an episode where they do show John spending time with the family, it's a beautiful thing. He is very capable of getting the kids dressed, feeding them, even putting them to bed, and things in the house still function safely and normally. It's crazy how tv really keeps John in the underdog light!
Response to Neeru:
Neeru, Do you feel it would have been possible to clarify your position in the relationship and then maintain a friendship? It seems to me your right, no matter what the issue will come up. I just believe that people can move on from those feelings and sustain meaningful friendships with boundaries. I speak from my own experience so I partial. And I'm like Chris where I've had my friendships since I was young, so maybe he's right-maybe developing them at a young age makes them less vulnerable to sexuality issues. I just feel like your missing out on a very insightful and meaningful experience by not having male friends. Don't give up-you'll meet someone who will be mature enough to handle your friendship in a strictly platonic manner!
Response to Ilia:
I think you are so right when you touched on the fact that self esteem plays a major role in what clouds your judgment. The thing with me, and maybe all females who knows-is the level of honesty that exists in a relationship. If my boyfriend has female friends that he hasn't said one word to me about-then I think something is funny. If someone is really your friend wouldn't they come up in conversation with your significant other? Maybe I'm wrong... but if he's open with me about his friendships, then I have no reason to think it's anything else. As a woman I do worry that their friendships will reach that point where sex may come up. But I have to have faith that my boyfriend will make his position clear and that they can carry on a friendship. What do yo do when people don't get the hint though? Friendships can go wrong and before you know it you could have a stalker... maybe a little extreme but you never know!
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Shaina, I feel your pain! It's very hard in this world we live in to understand if we as women are being caretakers because we throughly enjoy the rewarding ecperience of taking care of family, or because society has put this idea in our head that this is where we should be. It's confusing at times to be yourself if that mean helping and taking care of others yet still feel liberated and independent.It's like the two things can't exist together. This has been an ongoing problem for women and I wish I could help you find an answer. All I can say is be yourself, whoever that may be. Ans whether your labeled independent or whatever doesn't matter. I have a full household (boyfirend, 2 kids, and a dog!)I take of all by myself so when I get looks from friends because I dish my boyfirend's plate I think Oh well! I'd like to see them do what I do in one day!!
I think because of the ambiguous titles given for women(Ms, Mrs, ect) your almost in a no win situation. No matter which route you take some woman out there will be offended by not being called the right name. I use to work in daycare and one thing I liked about it is that all the children refer to their teachers as Miss and use their first name. In this situation marital status is irrelevant so you can never offend anyone. I use to work in the customer service field too(and will be returning shortly)and one problem I always had was with calling women ma'am. I thought it was respectful and helpful but I had a few women bite my head off for it. They felt ma'am is related to age and that I was insulting that. Go figure. I guess you really never can tell how to safely refer to another woman except maybe to use Miss. It's neutral, it's polite, and it gets the job done!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Friday, May 29, 2009
I find it very interesting that we don't even realize the implications of these names and labels. I always thought it was flattering or a nice gesture for someone to refer to me as "sweetheart" until I read these chapters and began to realize how demeaning they really are. The really funny part is that I call women "hon" or "sweetie" too. What am I doing to enforce this lower position?? I tried so hard to understand why I do it and obviously it's because it's been done to me. So it was a terrible realization I had to know that I was enforcing things. I guess the thing to do is when ever someone refers to you like that, simply state your name. I think that would be subtle enough to show that you don't want to be called pet names. Good luck!
Years ago I worked in a daycare and we had a dress up time where the toddlers could play with clothes brought in by different parents. One little boy, whose mom was single, kept putting on high heel shoes and dresses. Well his mom also happened to work there so when she saw him she came running in and told him not to do that. I felt so bad for the little boy and I wished the mom could see he was only copying the one role model he had. She asked us not to let him do that anymore. Fast forward 10 years later and I have 2 sons of my own (4 and 3). We were shoe shopping over the weekend and my youngest picked out a pair of pink crocs he wanted. My moment of truth- I wanted to let him get them sooooo bad- but I had to tell him no. His father and grandfather would have never let me hear the end of it. He would have been stared at in public and other parents would have asked me why. Why do we do this?? What harm could come of pink shoes?? I realized the power of society at that moment, and I would have much rather have been just a mom.